Sometimes people call me and they aren’t sure if they would like to have individual counseling, or couples counseling.  Every situation is a little different.

Questions I usually ask are:

Does your partner want to be in counseling?   If your partner does not want to be in counseling, I can give you suggestions on how to encourage your partner to give couples counseling a try.  There are things that you can do on your own to improve the relationship.

Are you having an affair?  If you are having an ongoing affair, it is usually better for you to see a counselor individually.  You need to sort out if you are being drawn to something new and fresh (the affair) or if your primary relationship is in fact over.

I usually recommend that people start with an assessment to see if couples counseling would be appropriate.  I can meet with the both of you and get an idea of what the dynamics are playing out in your relationship.  I can also let you know if I think one or the both of you might benefit from individual therapy.  I would be able to refer you to a therapist in the Burbank or Pasadena area.