It’s easy to observe other parents’ seeming lack of control in regards their children’s behavior and say to yourself “You know what, I could do a thousand times better than that at parenting!” Unfortunately, the truth of the matter is far more difficult than you might think. Many couples struggle with dialing in a cohesive parenting strategy that works well all the time. For starters, parents may not agree on which rules and values are important to instill in their kids. One parent may place great importance on dietary concerns, while the other parent is more interested in teaching kindness and compassion. It is important to realize that you might never agree on exactly what rules to enforce, but this shouldn’t prevent you from taking the time to iron out a compromise that both partners can agree upon. Once there is agreement at the parental level, it is much easier to come together as a team when enforcing rules. Having a consistent system of punishment and rewards will help prevent a child from trying to game the system — like getting more ice cream from dad or more playtime from mom. It is also necessary to realize that stress is going to arise, and when it does parents will often crumble under the pressure and throw all of their guidelines out the window. It is during these times when couples can become polarized in regards their parenting style and begin to act out their own differences within the context of parenting. Try to step back a bit if you find yourself getting pulled into negative conflicts around parenting. Bear in mind that developing a parenting style is an ongoing process, so advising and updating your guidelines is always a possibility. This is especially important with a child who may be attention-challenged or particularly rambunctious. Reconnecting with your partner in the spirit of a team will help make the difficult process of parenting run smoother.
Read the full article here: Sanity-Saving Parenting Rule for Couples
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