Why is it important to practice curiosity, even when we think we have our partners pegged?
In Psychology Today, guest author Nancy Colier, LCSW, Rev. shared her thoughts on maintaining interest in your relationship.
Essentially, curiosity is what keeps you attuned to your partner at the beginning of your relationship. Then, you were present and focused on learning all you could. You could wait to learn more. Yet, as time passes and you settle in, wanting to know more gives way to thinking you know all there is to know.
Allowing curiosity to fade often allows interest and listening to fade too. This is highly problematic, as this can cause your relationship to stagnate. It’s difficult to grow together when you stop paying attention to each other. You may miss the subtle signs of love that is thirsty for care until it is too far gone.
Curiosity indicates that, no matter how long you are together, your interest in your partner, your union, and your evolution remains intact. So, practice curiosity as a skill. You can start today.
As you restore interest and inquiry in your relationship understand that curiosity also allows for your partner’s experience to be as real and true as your own. Neither of you needs to advance an agenda or force any expectations on each other. Curiosity just asks and is interested without demanding or holding on to an answer too tightly. As Collier notes, curiosity is love.
Collier suggests that partners develop a habit of asking questions, listening closely to the responses, without assuming anything. Make an effort to meet each other daily as if it were the first meeting. She believes it’s worth the work. Getting to know your partner is an ongoing journey of evolving knowledge about each other.
Interested in learning more about developing curiosity in your relationship? Please read more here:
